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Creative Writing

My Portfolio site is up! Click here to visit.

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  1. Hi Julia,
    I chose that same source story! I like how you wrote your story to where all the mice lived even though he wanted to squeak out in fear. I made mine about frogs and a kitten. I like this concept of if whatever the character is just has a little patience or is disciplined enough to resist an urge, then it will be okay in the end. The turtle couldn't do it, and neither could the kitten in my story. Fortunately, your mouse was able to resist the fearful temptation. I also enjoy your dialogue. It fully communicates the mice's personalities, and helps progress the plot. Maybe adding a few sentences describing an interaction with the cat could add some more to the story. I would definitely keep it so all mice survive, but maybe the cat notices them and chases them just for a short bit of time. Great work!

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  2. Hi Julia,
    You transformed this story very well!! I could not recognize the original from reading. I love the little girl as a the outsider looking on to this small world. I feel like I am very guilty of this idea where I can be a little impatient sometimes. I blame it on my horoscope more than anything. Aries like things done! Anyways, was there a reason why you chose this story to be in your portfolio? What was the meaning behind the title of your portfolio? Also, I wonder what would have happened between the cat and mouse if it had woken up. Yay for happy endings! I guess my only suggestion would be to add some more drama into the story. Are you going to be using the same type of style for the rest of the stories? The style where you have like a story within a story?

    Can't wait to read more!

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